Kuala Lumpur - Sin City

A few weeks back we decided to visit our dear Irish friend Rob in KL, oh what a trip! Drunkeness, near death experiences, tall buildings, 50 year old women pimping out young men that look like women, street fights, dodgy taxi driver pimps... oh and 5 star luxury :D

The trip started out harmlessly enough with the arduous task of getting a cab in Singapore in the rain, luck fortunately was with us this time and we didn't miss our luxury double decker bus to KL. (Exhibit A below)

Exhibit A

Outta Singapore in a flash, and across the border to the outskirts of Johor Bahru(JB), our bus took the new crossing and we weren't stuck in a throng of people. We were on our way soon again after immigration.

We were greeted by the distant sights of the Petronas Towers around about 3 in the afternoon, and it took another half an hour for the bus to finally drop us off. To our excitement our hotel was just across the road, then... to our dismay we learned that the road was virtually uncrossable, high speed traffic, scooters and motorbikes that were bent on killing you, I had the additional burden of having Catherine Zeta Jones with me, so that added another 5 minutes onto the crossing at least. 5 near misses with motorbikes later, I was across the road and in the hotel.

Biker Gang ^_^ similar to what we faced getting across the road

It was ridiculous, for only 215 Malaysian Ringgits per night (less than $SGD100/$NZD100) you get 5 star treatment, admittedly we weren't staying in the presidential suite... or even the club level, but hey allow this bumpkin some excitement over his first stay in a luxury hotel. Oh, and this was the view from our room :P

GO PETRONAS TWIN TOWERS!!!111

We went on a wander, our original destination was to go down Jalan Sultan Ismail (which we later found out was perpendicular to our street), except due to Chad's inquisitveness and unique sense of direction we ended up on the opposite side of the city... :) We ended our misguided tour about 3 hours later having explore much more of the city than we'd anticipated (although we'd still not gone down Jalan Sultan Ismail). I was happy though, and my emotions are perfectly captured by the following photo:

The night ended outside Zouk (yay they have one in KL!!) watching the Germany vs. Costa Rica game and imbibing some cheap beer for a change. I had free flutter courtesy of the bar, but didn't manage to get any free drinks :(.

The next morning, we were sorely disappointed by the Petronas Towers, free entry to the Petronas Towers dictated that we would not be going up the towers, most people line up for tickets at 8 in the morning, I was still contemplating whether to get out of bed at 11:30.

All was not lost, as we ventured on to Menara KL (KL Tower, a broadcast tower thingamee)
, the view is much better and they have a lame culture show at the bottom :P. Snapped a few pics, and Chad tried to get some dodgy perspective shots in.



Met up with Rob at about 7 in the evening, and the night of debauchery began..., having been subject to harsh Singaporean liqour taxes for the past two months, it was time to loosen the purse strings (no I don't actually have a purse :P) and indulge in some good old fashioned NZ styled binge drinking!! After picking up some of Rob's friends we made our way to Passion nice wanky little club in the middle of KL's party area (JP Ramlee), massive main room playing RnB and party hip hop and the top floor / mezzanine playing prog. Great club, nice setting and we got very very drunk, drunk enough to lose two hot Swedish girls that Rob's friend found earlier in the night :'(.

Abruptly, things ended at 4, we were ushered out of passion and onto the streets. Soon a street fight involved when I witnessed the Fastest Indian In the World! Some Indian fella got in a fight with a bunch of people, was soon outnumbered, had a few punches landed on him and then promptly ran for his life. Scary? YES! Amusing? Also Yes :), I'm such a bastard.

Karma came and kicked me on the arse soon after for laughing at other's misfortunes when I was accosted by a ladyboy, I'd mistakenly made eye contact in my drunken state with someone who I thought was an incredibly beautiful GIRL, as she/he walked close, I realised that he/she was much taller than me and had certain manly features, I smiled sheepishly, broke off eye contact and walked away as fast as I could. I was drunk... but I wasn't THAAT drunk!!
A few hundred metres down the road, an old lady (must've been 50+) tried pimping out another ladyboy to me! Grabbed me on the arm and even resorting to speaking Mandarin with me to get me to spend what she described as a night of bliss with this um... person! :O

Somewhat sober now by the previous sobering experience, I got her to remove her hands and contemplated on telling her I was gay, then decided that it may have potentially worse repercussions, I made some excuses and began running back to the hotel. O Karma, I will never laugh at another's misfortune again!

As expected, Sunday was totally written off, visited Rob's palatial residence in the evening, and back to the hotel for some much needed rest.

Finally did some more sightseeing further afield at the Batu Caves on Monday, numerous Macaques and Hindu sculptures provided an afternoon of entertainment. Back on the bus by 6:00pm, safe and sound in Singapore away from all the scary encounters by midnight monday. Its good to be home :D